Thanks to a someone..

Life
prove that you are a women by sharing your tough times
PAST:               even though i am 14 my parents say i sound like an adult  , we can take this as a compliment or as a fault . i can’t take criticism  which makes me a very short – tempered girl and of course i hate that but i just cant control that. i shout at people because i can’t accept my faults  and later i just feel bad for myself. sometimes i think maybe i should stop acting like a baby but i just cant . then my bad side told me an option , why cant people control themselves from finding others faults ? of course they cant then why should i .people who dont even know me judge me by my appearance , then why should i control myself ( i always find these stupid thinking to calm myself :p) .
okay, i agree . i am not a beauty queen or anything but i too surely has feelings . i always worry about my weight and my face . i am not so confident going to parties . and most of all when you have a perfect sister and brother , who wants to go ? my sister and brother always takes the pleasure in watching me get criticized . i dont know how they can take criticizes really well , but i guess its because they rarely get some . maybe i am being a little bit over . maybe people  care for me and they just want me to be a better person. but sometimes i just cant take it no more .
PRESENT:            but today i am a little changed just because of a little girl last year who changed my thinking . i came to school early and my teacher asked me to look after the small children in other building ..i was a little lazy but i did thinking i would get extra marks . i was walking slowly and my friend came with me and when we reached the classroom the children became so quiet  and i thought how can we make them even quieter , but after five minutes the truth became unbearable . children were roaming here and there , but i took my best side out and made them quiet and introduced many fun activities. within a few minutes the class was quiet again and we made some jokes took make them laugh which we realized that later was a mistake :) . after some time , my friend left to look after another class and i was alone. it felt a bit weird but i think i quite adjusted .the bell rang and i left the class. this later became my daily routine and i was having fun , and i was talking with the small students about their role models, their favorite teachers , and stuff like that  . then came this little girl and i asked her who her favorite teacher was and she replied ‘ i don’t like any teachers ‘ . i said ‘ ok’ . then i asked her ‘ who is you are role model?’ and she replied’ its you’ . i was clearly stunned at her answer and asked her why and she told me ‘ you make me feel special, no teachers make me feel this . you treat me like everyone else . you never take interest in a particular girl’ . for a moment i was struck, is this really coming out of a small little girl ? later when i became normal i told her the same bullshit my mom say when i am hurt.she went back to her place and the bell rang.
maybe  the reason i get so angry is because no one took the pleasure in making me feel special or maybe its just my jealousy par acting up.yes , i am jealous . but of whom ? everyone ? why? because they feel special? today it still makes me think , what her little lips told me . she told me that i make her feel special. maybe it was one of my qualities – i make everyone feel special. even this slight thought made me cheerful. maybe it was true, maybe i should take charge of my life . i dont have to feel hurt when a person who have no place in my life ,just come and tell me my faults . maybe i should just smile and say ‘ i know’ . maybe these faults show me who i really am . all thanks to that little girl who does not even know she changed the life of a person with her precious words.
FUTURE:               i, Lynn Antony , hereby vow to never get hurt or feel useless in the words of a complete stranger and promise to make in my efforts to make everyone feel special and to never try to change the person i am.

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