The Deranged Thoughts Of A Girl

I am a selfish poet. The whole selfless idea leaves me confused. Sure,it does have a romantic and philosophical touch to it. Some people say when they read a poem and make it theirs,they feel connected. Like they belong. I can't deny it. When I read a poem, I start searching for myself in it. "Lost they are,happy they are too." What is the first thought that came to your mind? A group of people who are lost but they are happy too. Then we start building around those words. Lost doesn't always seem bad and happiness is all that matters and what not. "The paper boats are on a voyage, Lost they are, happy they are too." Now you are confused. But you still try. A child that is playing with paper boats. Yes, almost there. You gather your own meaning. Damn! That was good. My thoughts on writing these two lines? I wrote the second line first because it suddenly came to me when I touched the keyboard. Should make it more interesting? Maybe a touch of

I have given less thought to this post but it stays true without a change in its shade. I personally admire people who smile a lot. Smiling sounds so simple. But it isn't. Have you ever tried to force a smile? The feeling is horrible. Every muscle in your face becomes so rigid,it's almost like you did a workout. ( Okay,lame jokes aside.) Sad smiles are even worse. But being positive, it's still a smile. So moving on to what this post is really about. I met someone who lives in a house I pass by everyday when I go home. The road,in front of her house, is full of potholes and cracks and being a really aloof walker, I can't reach the other end without bleeding if I don't look down and walk. It has been 2 years. Our friendship is going strong. We never talk. We don't know each other's name or what we do or what we plan on doing. It's good. The only thing we share is a smile. At first, it started off as a 'hello!new person' smile. But then it b

Today as I stand here I am scared of myself. Scared of who I have turned to be. I feel like crying because I feel like I have changed. Not my appearance, not my ideals, not my dreams, but simply the way I think. Everything has been covered by a black veil to be protected from dust,rain, anything but it's useless. It should have been destroyed a long time back. But I didn't. A life full of regrets. It was pouring heavily. And I just let myself get drenched. I can feel myself standing on the middle of the road, drenched, shivering but smiling. A smile I am all too ready to withdraw immediately. I was alone. In this big happy world ,I was alone. In my big family, I was alone. I didn't feel heard. I was dying inside. Everyday I walk to that tiny corner of my heart that is covered in dust. I try to clean only to end up coughing. I can see the black veil here and there. But everything's hidden even though they are scarcely covered. Everyday I try to sit and confess. Ever

I was out with my mom for a walk. We believed we were ready to lose weight before this majestic function and give up on our favourite foods. Oh,who were we kidding? On the way, I saw a child bugging her grandmother to get her the beautiful flower but the moment she got it she saw me and rushed to me with it. She offered me the flower but I was hesitant to take it because she really wanted it. She kept on insisting so I finally took it and resumed our walk. Despite all the things that happened,my mom was surprised at the flower as she was busy sharing a 5 minute talk of her life with the neighbour. I explained that the child gave me her flower and was sincerely so happy about it. For me, I was really selfish at that age and it always melted my heart to see children who are so kind. They were so pure. Throughout the walk,I had the usual tendencies of peeling of the stem, plucking out the petals and just throwing the unseen loveliness into the abandoned sidewalk. But the moment I t

 'So here I stand having second thoughts about it again. But I have promised myself that this time around that I will not crawl back to that tiny vestige of my mind and will let it all out. To stop just letting it all get lost in my drafts'                                                                 -Sarah Sarah seems very quiet and calm outside but it's not difficult for someone to notice that she is fighting a lot of thoughts inside. She worries about the most strangest of things. She likes talking to kids but she sometimes feel so bored that she'll feel guilty about it. She worries whether she is helping the kids intellectually. Nodding,smiling, listening,giggling, is that enough? She asks. Yes, I reply. But she has already got on another train full of thoughts. She often gets lost in her own world,her own idea but she never loses her balance. Call her name once and she'll be right back where you want her to be. Maybe she should not. Maybe she shoul