Lost in the drafts - 1
'So here I stand having second thoughts about it again. But I have promised myself that this time around that I will not crawl back to that tiny vestige of my mind and will let it all out. To stop just letting it all get lost in my drafts'
-Sarah
Sarah seems very quiet and calm outside but it's not difficult for someone to notice that she is fighting a lot of thoughts inside. She worries about the most strangest of things. She likes talking to kids but she sometimes feel so bored that she'll feel guilty about it. She worries whether she is helping the kids intellectually. Nodding,smiling, listening,giggling, is that enough? She asks. Yes, I reply. But she has already got on another train full of thoughts.
She often gets lost in her own world,her own idea but she never loses her balance. Call her name once and she'll be right back where you want her to be. Maybe she should not. Maybe she should never come back. Is she a slave to present herself the moment someone has a need to be fulfilled? She shouldn't be.
She is beautiful. The kind you'd never notice amongst a crowd but only when you are having a slightly cold coffee at the corner of that small coffeeshop. You'll notice how she finds even miniscule details amusing. You will surprise yourself by the details she grasps in the few minutes her mind wanders. And when she leaves, you'll look at your half-filled cup of coffee that has turned completely cold and leave it there. That will probably be the best coffee you ever had.
She is capable of giving colours to her butterfly but she is unable to make it fly? But she should. She can. She will. I believe in her. Don't you? She gives everyone their own space to get comfortable. But is she giving away too much of her space? She is very envious of people who can talk confidently about themselves. She asks me why can't she and then starts laughing. She barely sees herself as a person. She doesn't regret anything she says. I waited a long time for her to speak again. But it seemed like she was done.
I wanted her to speak more, express more, speak for herself more, but even my dreamy heart knew she was done.
I expressed my gratitude and prepares to leave. It surprises me how simple she is. How could she be? All I can feel in her eyes is happiness. Shouldn't I be able to sense other emotions too? Was I disappointed?
Yes I was. Because of an idea I had in my mind. That a simple person is vague. Why does someone have to beautiful and at the same time be broken,hurt or sad? Why can't they just be BEAUTIFUL? Why so many labels that make us feel that you have to go through one to feel the other? Why did I make Sarah sound so complicated and mysterious when she doesn't feel so herself? Why can't she just be free,simple and lovely without having no backstories? Why can't anyone describe someone as real as they are? Why do backstories have to matter a lot about who we are today? Because of an idea.
I turn back one last time to watch her. She hasn't left yet. She is waving at me with a smile on her face. I wave back. Thank you Sarah for feeding an idea in my head. Thank you.
P.S. Phewww! What was that? Don't ask me back! Please tell me your answer so that I can steal it? Thanks for spending ( wasting) your time! 😁🙏
PS.S. Let me know if you want more series like these. By the way, even if you said no,I would still post them because I have very few ideas 😬.
-Sarah
Sarah seems very quiet and calm outside but it's not difficult for someone to notice that she is fighting a lot of thoughts inside. She worries about the most strangest of things. She likes talking to kids but she sometimes feel so bored that she'll feel guilty about it. She worries whether she is helping the kids intellectually. Nodding,smiling, listening,giggling, is that enough? She asks. Yes, I reply. But she has already got on another train full of thoughts.
She often gets lost in her own world,her own idea but she never loses her balance. Call her name once and she'll be right back where you want her to be. Maybe she should not. Maybe she should never come back. Is she a slave to present herself the moment someone has a need to be fulfilled? She shouldn't be.
She is beautiful. The kind you'd never notice amongst a crowd but only when you are having a slightly cold coffee at the corner of that small coffeeshop. You'll notice how she finds even miniscule details amusing. You will surprise yourself by the details she grasps in the few minutes her mind wanders. And when she leaves, you'll look at your half-filled cup of coffee that has turned completely cold and leave it there. That will probably be the best coffee you ever had.
She is capable of giving colours to her butterfly but she is unable to make it fly? But she should. She can. She will. I believe in her. Don't you? She gives everyone their own space to get comfortable. But is she giving away too much of her space? She is very envious of people who can talk confidently about themselves. She asks me why can't she and then starts laughing. She barely sees herself as a person. She doesn't regret anything she says. I waited a long time for her to speak again. But it seemed like she was done.
I wanted her to speak more, express more, speak for herself more, but even my dreamy heart knew she was done.
I expressed my gratitude and prepares to leave. It surprises me how simple she is. How could she be? All I can feel in her eyes is happiness. Shouldn't I be able to sense other emotions too? Was I disappointed?
Yes I was. Because of an idea I had in my mind. That a simple person is vague. Why does someone have to beautiful and at the same time be broken,hurt or sad? Why can't they just be BEAUTIFUL? Why so many labels that make us feel that you have to go through one to feel the other? Why did I make Sarah sound so complicated and mysterious when she doesn't feel so herself? Why can't she just be free,simple and lovely without having no backstories? Why can't anyone describe someone as real as they are? Why do backstories have to matter a lot about who we are today? Because of an idea.
I turn back one last time to watch her. She hasn't left yet. She is waving at me with a smile on her face. I wave back. Thank you Sarah for feeding an idea in my head. Thank you.
P.S. Phewww! What was that? Don't ask me back! Please tell me your answer so that I can steal it? Thanks for spending ( wasting) your time! 😁🙏
PS.S. Let me know if you want more series like these. By the way, even if you said no,I would still post them because I have very few ideas 😬.
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