People try (last part)

How do you tell someone that they mean a lot to you because a few words stringed together would never do justice to how they make you feel. How someone feels like a beautiful clear day you'd watch after a stormy night, both of them magnificent on their own but we wouldn't appreciate one if the other weren't present. How someone feels like the hands that guide the paper boats in rainy season, while all the others watched theirs sink. How someone feels like the type of person you have always wanted to meet but never knew until you started talking to them.

Someone that carried the burdens of her life on her shoulders yet laughed so brightly that your heart eases just a little knowing that she's here. She saw the world for its cruelty and kindness. She saw everyone for their insecurities and strengths. But she was kind about it, undeniably. And I saw her. She is the humblest person I have ever known. She'd take me out on walks and share the most complicated parts of her stories while the sun was still above our heads. As the sun sets by bringing about an array of shadows on the road, be it shops, the people who are rushing by, or the people who have sat down with their friends. It was then she shared the most lovely parts of her story. It was weird, most people have it the other way around. I don't think she has ever noticed it about herself. Maybe she never wanted to hide who she was in the comforts of the night and put on a human mask when the sun rose. Once you get to know her you can't help saying to yourself 'She has a touch of God in her.' 


To the person who always saw me for me, to the person that showed me the comforts in streetlights, cups of coffee, churches, crying, listening to weird song choices when your head is in a mess, just using words. To the person who has never given me the opportunity to miss her. To the person that feels equally lost as I do sometimes. No, I mean literally. We need to strengthen our sense of direction. To the person that is one of the best thing that has ever happened to me. 

There was this writer I once used to admire. He had his own small crowd of followers, I read one of his writings and was immediately stunned. No two of his writings gave off the same voice,one could never guess what he was gonna write. One day I'd read his story in my mind in a deep lovely voice and the other I'd read them in a strangely soft tone, and another in tears. He had a strange way of storytelling and the best kind. I remember one of them being about how a girl he loved felt like the colour blue. I vaguely remember it's exact contents but I was quite amazed by it. He left it at that but I didn't, maybe I even read into it more than I should have. That he wrote 'colour blue' instead of blue. But when he wrote it and I read it, I felt it. I felt that the person he was writing about felt like the colour blue. And I can't explain how delighted I was. 

And the fact that I read that many years before I met her and the first thought that popped into my mind when I wondered how I'd thank her for everything she had done was this, it took me by surprise. To the person that I needed more than she needed me at the time, you feel like a mixture of so many colours and I am glad I met you. Thank you for everything.

People never know how to tell someone they have found solace in them. People try and people fail. But people try again. And it is a beautiful struggle to find words that fit right in and occupy a place in their hearts. 

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