My take on love
Maybe I've been writing a lot about love these days. Maybe I behave in a way that 'people in love' does. Maybe love is very underrated. I am very concerned about this fact. so, here is my epitome on it. Or maybe I am just ranting about why I see love from a whole different angle and it might sound weird to you guys but its a pretty elevated feeling. "I don't wanna marry", these four words can cause chaos in the most peaceful situations. Trust me, if you feel like your parents or just people doesn't give much attention to you, I promise you that these four magic words stringed together can give you the ultimate fame. You become the source of all silly debates,attention forms a heavy cloud over your head promising to shower you with it all day. I mean its nothing but its everything. I hope you are getting the gist of it.
Because I relate to everything with my experiences, I might be able to tell you all about my life with this tiny topic (so shallow,huh? Hurry!Go grab popcorn,the show's starting!). As a child, I always dreamt about marriage. I am not exaggerating. I dreamt of marriage, what its gonna be like and mainly who is it gonna be. I guess its very common. We all have dreamt about it (Now, I dream about food-Fact). Because I had strict parents, I always thought about arranged marriages. Its a lot more complicated with arranged marriages. Honestly,I used to be so scared about who I would marry- would he be tall?too tall?what if he's so short?what if he's not good looking?- I used to pray to god that he should give me a good husband and I even promised that I wouldn't get angry with mom if he did so. Yes, welcome to my pathetic life. My dad always used to fast forward the romantic scenes of a movie while we are watching and comments on how bad it is. Hence, for me dating was a sin. And that was my childhood concept of love.
If I recall properly, around my early teen days I used to be so worried if I would even get a proposal for marriage. What if I was to stay alone for life? My sister was so young,yet she had people lining for her to complete her studies (She looks like an angel and she is one too) and I was sitting with my zit-filled face worrying to death. Marriage is essential, it is a part of human life. Marriage equalises to the importance of water in our lives (okay, a bit exaggerated). I mean like it was like a stage in the life cycle of human beings. Marriage was a degree in life, one you should earn before 25 maximum or you are a lost cause.
But it didn't really have to be. Heck no, its not even a neccesity. Maybe thats when I realized that its just a concept encrypted into our heads from the time we are born that a person should marry. I mean we all know the reasons for marriage (You dirty-minded freak) and I am not coming to the conclusion that marriage is bad. I wanted to let people know that choosing whether to marry or not to should be like a simple life decision, and not one that should be showered with criticism,debates and being the main gossip topic of all family events. Its just a person who decides not to marry simply doesn't wanna marry. Period. There is no need to start an investigation to find the reason about why we are commiting this 'crime'.Wow,how beautifully I got deviated from the topic. Okay,concentrate.
So,where was I? Yeah,everything revolves around marriage (Exaggeration:2). The fact that marriage is even considered as a milestone in life is really irritating to me. Like, first you are born,then you gotta go to a school,then you gotta go to a college,then you gotta get a job (for girls,job isn't even compulsory), then you gotta get married, then you gotta have kids, then you gotta raise them, and then after everything, you gotta die. If you are thirty and not married,god bless your poor soul. "Why are you not getting married?", "Is noone willing to marry you yet?", "Try this face cream, maybe this will help you find someone.", "Pray everyday, God will help you." Maybe they don't even wanna marry, ever considered that fact. In my opinion, most marriages these days are pressurised ones. Pressure from society, from relatives,from family. The main reason I hate society is because people rarely do anything for themselves these days. Okay, distracted again.
Well, lets discuss what I really wanted to now. So basically all my life I have been taught that after a particular age, you are supposed to get married. But I finally came to the realisation that it is not a necessity and I am very happy about it. Living for myself, I am maybe a bit more attached to that concept. You can call me self-obsessed,lonely,dettached, or anything you want but I will hugely disagree if you say 'I am scared of love'. I am not. In fact, I am deeply, passionately and honestly in love with love. Just not in the kind of love that involves one person, oh that came out wrong. Just not in the kind of love that exists in relationships, uh no. How am I gonna explain this? Hmmm, I am much more devoted to the love in friendships and family. Oh my god, I am so bad at explaining these. Anyway, the thing is I love people but I love it more when I see people showing love. Thats it, I am giving up. Maybe I should stop writing altogether, what am I even talking about?
My granny and grandpa, they literally fight all the time. I mean its very hilarious to watch the beautiful showcase of sarcasm-filled words but I always felt bad thinking that maybe they really hate each other. But I was proved wrong and that day I almost cried. My grandpa got really sick one day that he said he wanted to see all of us. I was literally freaking out because I know what happens in movies. When we reached,all three of us rushed inside and lay beside him. For the first time in his life,the warmth radiating from his body defeated the purely glowing fire in his eyes. I urged myself not to cry. Then my granny walked in with some food but he refused to eat it. My granny got so angry that she screamed "Just eat something! Anything!", and I could see the fear in her eyes lining the tears that would fall out but I knew it wouldn't because even though she was a poor soul,she was tremendously strong around people that needed strength. And grandpa replied with a sigh "I don't want anything. You just sit beside me, that's enough.", and the way she let out a small smile, quickly hiding it, I witnessed such a beautiful moment. He's healthy as ever now and they still fight everyday but I know deep down they care for each other to infinity. That is definitely love and I feel truly privileged to witness all this.
My brother rarely compliments me, like basically never. The most highly praise he has ever given me is an 'okay'. So, we were preparing for exams and we had switched off the fan because we knew we would get sleepy (ideal planning). But after sometime it became a bit hot and he asked me to switch it on. So as I got up from my lazy position, a strand of hair fell over my eyes. Taking advantage of the situation to get a compliment out of him, I said "Do I look pretty or not?",posing gracefully (okay, weirdly). He looked at me for a moment understanding the seriousness of the situation, he said yes because he knew otherwise I wouldn't switch on the fan ( Yes, I am very brilliant. Please stop applauding now.). Then I went on to switch it on and with a smile I said "Even if you said no, I would have switched it on." I expected him to say something sarcastic but imagine my surprise when he said "I know."Maybe if he used to compliment me daily, I wouldn't have felt so happy at that moment and I promise you that it was such an a happy feeling. A pure moment of affection.(I am just citing an example to let you know how beautiful I am, stop laughing now!)
Even my mom and dad, they are very caring sometimes and some days they act like they hate the sight of each other. But when anyone blames the other, they protest so hard and lovingly that your heart just melts. Its all these tiny moments. I am afraid of a world that is deprived of love. But I am a person who is not a fan of continuous affectionate actions. Maybe that's why I don't like relationships that much. Maybe its because of how systematised it is. Like, gifts for valentine's day, three hours of talk each day, no I am not saying that it is bad, I am just citing the facts that put me off. In fact, I am a person that encourages relationships a lot, get excited for people whose boyfriend is bringing a suprise gift to, complimenting on how cute a couple looks together,even trying to match-make. But I don't want any of these for myself. Thats okay,right? I mean I would be a huge failure at these things. Like I won't even know its valentine's day so expecting a gift from me maybe a bit of a high expectation. I would probably be sleeping so don't even expect phone calls and besides I never recharge my phone. I can't get all lovey-dovey with words (I can but I won't), like if you are my imaginary boyfriend, I would probably just say "Hey, that's a nice shirt. By the way, you and Melissa would make such a great pair.", I am not kidding, I am one hundred percent sure I would do this.
So what I am coming to is that I am happy with my life and the love that I am getting from people around me. And the reason I simply don't wanna marry is because I don't think I need that 'the one' person in my life. And people should be free to marry whenever they want, please society just let them be. I want you to get married when you feel it in your bones that you don't wanna be apart from them anymore. I want you to get married only if you want to. If you don't, you don't have to. Get married at 45,60 or evn 80, just do it when you wanna do it,but not before 18 or 21 because its prohibited and you'll probably go to jail.
The thing is, I am a sucker for love, but more of a sucker for those tiny affectionate moments that most people don't even notice. The thing is, you'll find me writing a post about how sweetly a small girl, who is a stranger to me, smiled at me rather than how gloriously a guy proposed me. The thing is, I am very bad at expressing love but I am very happy at the presene of all people that I know loves me. I admit it that I have fell in love, felt like I could just talk to him all day, felt like seeing him all day and not wanting the day to get over, felt like I was walking on snow (I love snow,being numb is my essence),felt all the things people say you would but maybe I was more in love with myself. The fact that I had to change myself for someone else doesn't appeal to me and it won't ever. So, there you go.
P.S.I am a very informal writer and not so proud about it. Such bad content and positioning but I still wanna post it because I guess that's the only way I will even try to improve (Or maybe because I am just too lazy). And I easily get distracted.Very open to opinions so feel free to comment. Thanks for your precious time!
Because I relate to everything with my experiences, I might be able to tell you all about my life with this tiny topic (so shallow,huh? Hurry!Go grab popcorn,the show's starting!). As a child, I always dreamt about marriage. I am not exaggerating. I dreamt of marriage, what its gonna be like and mainly who is it gonna be. I guess its very common. We all have dreamt about it (Now, I dream about food-Fact). Because I had strict parents, I always thought about arranged marriages. Its a lot more complicated with arranged marriages. Honestly,I used to be so scared about who I would marry- would he be tall?too tall?what if he's so short?what if he's not good looking?- I used to pray to god that he should give me a good husband and I even promised that I wouldn't get angry with mom if he did so. Yes, welcome to my pathetic life. My dad always used to fast forward the romantic scenes of a movie while we are watching and comments on how bad it is. Hence, for me dating was a sin. And that was my childhood concept of love.
If I recall properly, around my early teen days I used to be so worried if I would even get a proposal for marriage. What if I was to stay alone for life? My sister was so young,yet she had people lining for her to complete her studies (She looks like an angel and she is one too) and I was sitting with my zit-filled face worrying to death. Marriage is essential, it is a part of human life. Marriage equalises to the importance of water in our lives (okay, a bit exaggerated). I mean like it was like a stage in the life cycle of human beings. Marriage was a degree in life, one you should earn before 25 maximum or you are a lost cause.
But it didn't really have to be. Heck no, its not even a neccesity. Maybe thats when I realized that its just a concept encrypted into our heads from the time we are born that a person should marry. I mean we all know the reasons for marriage (You dirty-minded freak) and I am not coming to the conclusion that marriage is bad. I wanted to let people know that choosing whether to marry or not to should be like a simple life decision, and not one that should be showered with criticism,debates and being the main gossip topic of all family events. Its just a person who decides not to marry simply doesn't wanna marry. Period. There is no need to start an investigation to find the reason about why we are commiting this 'crime'.Wow,how beautifully I got deviated from the topic. Okay,concentrate.
So,where was I? Yeah,everything revolves around marriage (Exaggeration:2). The fact that marriage is even considered as a milestone in life is really irritating to me. Like, first you are born,then you gotta go to a school,then you gotta go to a college,then you gotta get a job (for girls,job isn't even compulsory), then you gotta get married, then you gotta have kids, then you gotta raise them, and then after everything, you gotta die. If you are thirty and not married,god bless your poor soul. "Why are you not getting married?", "Is noone willing to marry you yet?", "Try this face cream, maybe this will help you find someone.", "Pray everyday, God will help you." Maybe they don't even wanna marry, ever considered that fact. In my opinion, most marriages these days are pressurised ones. Pressure from society, from relatives,from family. The main reason I hate society is because people rarely do anything for themselves these days. Okay, distracted again.
Well, lets discuss what I really wanted to now. So basically all my life I have been taught that after a particular age, you are supposed to get married. But I finally came to the realisation that it is not a necessity and I am very happy about it. Living for myself, I am maybe a bit more attached to that concept. You can call me self-obsessed,lonely,dettached, or anything you want but I will hugely disagree if you say 'I am scared of love'. I am not. In fact, I am deeply, passionately and honestly in love with love. Just not in the kind of love that involves one person, oh that came out wrong. Just not in the kind of love that exists in relationships, uh no. How am I gonna explain this? Hmmm, I am much more devoted to the love in friendships and family. Oh my god, I am so bad at explaining these. Anyway, the thing is I love people but I love it more when I see people showing love. Thats it, I am giving up. Maybe I should stop writing altogether, what am I even talking about?
My granny and grandpa, they literally fight all the time. I mean its very hilarious to watch the beautiful showcase of sarcasm-filled words but I always felt bad thinking that maybe they really hate each other. But I was proved wrong and that day I almost cried. My grandpa got really sick one day that he said he wanted to see all of us. I was literally freaking out because I know what happens in movies. When we reached,all three of us rushed inside and lay beside him. For the first time in his life,the warmth radiating from his body defeated the purely glowing fire in his eyes. I urged myself not to cry. Then my granny walked in with some food but he refused to eat it. My granny got so angry that she screamed "Just eat something! Anything!", and I could see the fear in her eyes lining the tears that would fall out but I knew it wouldn't because even though she was a poor soul,she was tremendously strong around people that needed strength. And grandpa replied with a sigh "I don't want anything. You just sit beside me, that's enough.", and the way she let out a small smile, quickly hiding it, I witnessed such a beautiful moment. He's healthy as ever now and they still fight everyday but I know deep down they care for each other to infinity. That is definitely love and I feel truly privileged to witness all this.
My brother rarely compliments me, like basically never. The most highly praise he has ever given me is an 'okay'. So, we were preparing for exams and we had switched off the fan because we knew we would get sleepy (ideal planning). But after sometime it became a bit hot and he asked me to switch it on. So as I got up from my lazy position, a strand of hair fell over my eyes. Taking advantage of the situation to get a compliment out of him, I said "Do I look pretty or not?",posing gracefully (okay, weirdly). He looked at me for a moment understanding the seriousness of the situation, he said yes because he knew otherwise I wouldn't switch on the fan ( Yes, I am very brilliant. Please stop applauding now.). Then I went on to switch it on and with a smile I said "Even if you said no, I would have switched it on." I expected him to say something sarcastic but imagine my surprise when he said "I know."Maybe if he used to compliment me daily, I wouldn't have felt so happy at that moment and I promise you that it was such an a happy feeling. A pure moment of affection.(I am just citing an example to let you know how beautiful I am, stop laughing now!)
Even my mom and dad, they are very caring sometimes and some days they act like they hate the sight of each other. But when anyone blames the other, they protest so hard and lovingly that your heart just melts. Its all these tiny moments. I am afraid of a world that is deprived of love. But I am a person who is not a fan of continuous affectionate actions. Maybe that's why I don't like relationships that much. Maybe its because of how systematised it is. Like, gifts for valentine's day, three hours of talk each day, no I am not saying that it is bad, I am just citing the facts that put me off. In fact, I am a person that encourages relationships a lot, get excited for people whose boyfriend is bringing a suprise gift to, complimenting on how cute a couple looks together,even trying to match-make. But I don't want any of these for myself. Thats okay,right? I mean I would be a huge failure at these things. Like I won't even know its valentine's day so expecting a gift from me maybe a bit of a high expectation. I would probably be sleeping so don't even expect phone calls and besides I never recharge my phone. I can't get all lovey-dovey with words (I can but I won't), like if you are my imaginary boyfriend, I would probably just say "Hey, that's a nice shirt. By the way, you and Melissa would make such a great pair.", I am not kidding, I am one hundred percent sure I would do this.
So what I am coming to is that I am happy with my life and the love that I am getting from people around me. And the reason I simply don't wanna marry is because I don't think I need that 'the one' person in my life. And people should be free to marry whenever they want, please society just let them be. I want you to get married when you feel it in your bones that you don't wanna be apart from them anymore. I want you to get married only if you want to. If you don't, you don't have to. Get married at 45,60 or evn 80, just do it when you wanna do it,but not before 18 or 21 because its prohibited and you'll probably go to jail.
The thing is, I am a sucker for love, but more of a sucker for those tiny affectionate moments that most people don't even notice. The thing is, you'll find me writing a post about how sweetly a small girl, who is a stranger to me, smiled at me rather than how gloriously a guy proposed me. The thing is, I am very bad at expressing love but I am very happy at the presene of all people that I know loves me. I admit it that I have fell in love, felt like I could just talk to him all day, felt like seeing him all day and not wanting the day to get over, felt like I was walking on snow (I love snow,being numb is my essence),felt all the things people say you would but maybe I was more in love with myself. The fact that I had to change myself for someone else doesn't appeal to me and it won't ever. So, there you go.
P.S.I am a very informal writer and not so proud about it. Such bad content and positioning but I still wanna post it because I guess that's the only way I will even try to improve (Or maybe because I am just too lazy). And I easily get distracted.Very open to opinions so feel free to comment. Thanks for your precious time!
Comments
Post a Comment